i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
