Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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