i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
