I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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