yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
