Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
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