I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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