I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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