Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Is Oprah even human
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
