i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I'm really busy with my period
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