i just wanna soil my oats bro
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize