Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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