Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
