As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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