dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
