The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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