talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
