What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
even my farts smell like vagina
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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