put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
