Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
