I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize