so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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