It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Too much gin, very little bucket
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
