She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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