i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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