I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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