I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
