we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
