I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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