I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
