So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
