I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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