well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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