So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
