I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
