I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
