Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
