yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize