And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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