My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
