She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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