I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
