For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
