Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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