Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
