How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
