I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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