worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
