He is an equal opportunity slut.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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