There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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